Thursday, November 26, 2009

new moon, new vision ... new music ...

so ...

i'm in paris fool ...

i just saw this movie NEW MOON w/ lil cuz. she's a has a crush on this taylor lautner dude. who has his shirt off for 1/2 the movie. which i'm sure fueled the record breaking $72.2 million opening night! in one day! anyway ...
what up ...

i had a great day today. it was great for me because i had a break through on my writing. today i found a spot on a bench, on the channel, across from the ugliest building in paris! maybe the ugliest i've ever seen. it was a big ass vertical corrugated metal box with a 2 story smoke stack coming out the top. no windows. it was terrible but ... i sat down and started writing and what i needed to write came out today. i recognized that i'd been trying to force stuff. but this is unquestionably what i need to be writing ...

"it is the story of a man who had options. He took both right & left turns in life and did so knowing that he couldn't turn back the hands of time so he never regretted anything. he felt felt that the decisions were the right for him at that moment in his evolution so he never looked back. He loved, lost love and made love, made friends and made enemies."

i'm excited about this new direction. i like the idea of a story that includes all of these elements and a character that has enough depth that you see the complexities of life in the character and they can be shard in any setting because of the characters depth. you may love some decisions and hate others. love some actions and hate others. agree w/ some logic and others you may disagree with. yu may even hate their reasoning to do something but love what they do. and hate them afterward! it's a emotional roller coaster and what could be a real story!

the other part of this is that i feel like to day has clarified a few things for me interms of my life direction. i'm still scared to say that i'm an artist and that i need to dedicate my self to being artistic but i kinda know that i NEED to make place to create art in my life. but i'm not with being poor and without any more!!! if that means getting gig at a burger joint so that i can do it ... c'est la vie ... ok not really but i'm willing to spend a portion of my time working for someone else so that i can make great things happen in my life knowing that will touch the others in the long run. plus it will only be for a short time! anyone hiring ... hahaha ... but for real ... what up! or even better ... someone wanna be my angel patron or get me arts residency created for recovering workaholic arts administrators!)

i also recognized that i'm really willing and i HAVE to to make more sacrifices in general if i really want the growth that i say i want to happen in various areas of my life ... personal, professional, emotional, spiritual, physical, intellectual, etc! [thank you & i'm sorry: fam, friends, ex's, environment's, munch, mom, pop, aunts, uncles, ex's, nj, niambi, nik, lisandra (keep sending me stuff), ny, shawn, toy, andrea, mal, dc, rahshaan, skillz, u street, probably you, and you, and you ... etc!) and by coincidence ...

it's thanksgiving today too ... and wednesday we gathered as peoples and had dinner together ... but we do that often. we did talk about the things we're thankful for. but in general ...

i don't like holidays ... actually ... i don't like being told when i'm supposed to make a moment that was important to you, important in my life & add it as a ritual in my lifestyle. (ok ... yea at time i have issues w/ authority). plus ... i'm thankful everyday! and no one, especially not the US gov't which did so much to TRY to destroy my family & community, is gonna tell me (and/or my peoples) when i celebrate the people i love! they say they're making it easier by giving every one a day off but then they capitalize on it so much that it's often times detrimental to the individuals that they created the "holiday" for. well in my case ... they got the wrong idea ... i'm free! and i say that with love for my peoples, my freedom and a belief in truth and justice.

and i'm not a scrooge ... and just to show you i'm not crazy ... peep the video ... it is comedy!!! thanks to my mellow, my man, who you should all peep and check his art and activism ... the incredible ... josh healy

ohh ...
in 2010 gil scott heron & sade

and if you remember this album called reasonable doubts ... it had a couple tracks produced by this NC crew named roca bloc (ski) ... look out for his new collaboration ...

and fly gypsy ...

get the vodka & rum mixtape here

the other part of this trip is that i wanna connect the dots for artist and dj's in the states to venues & promoters here.i've missed a couple chances but i'm on it this weekend.

i also missed my new homie welela's performance tonight. my bad ... other duties had to be taken care of first. but we still peoples right!?!

shouts to KCH crew, sol, paris, melodie, mervin, shelli and me and u!

live your truth ...

SHiNE [brillez]

Sunday, November 22, 2009

see i am in paris ...

So it's been a real cool couple of days ...

I took a few days off to kick it but i'm still doing my morning ritual.

the morning was spent chillin' & reading. then rockstar cuz ask if i wanna go hang w/ him & lil cuz for a second. and we roll out and go meet his boy at the end of the block. he's this cool english cat w/ this artistic flair for fashion and music. he's just real cool. this great positive vibe. we walk and talk. then grab some school books for lil cuz. while walking he talks about doing a string of shows and then having to cancel a few recently because of a health issues. we stop and grab food afterwards. charlie hits us with a jokes and then pulls out this e-ray he's been carrying around and tell us why he's messed up right now due to this issue! i'm looking at the x-rays in amazement because i think that i can see something a little messed up. but hey ... i'm no doctor and he's been seeing specialist regarding the issue. anyway ... i play it off. he tells another joke and we part ways. he's gotta get some rest. real cool cat.

So later that afternoon ... my homie welela hits me on e-mail and says bobbito is spinning in paris tonight. I'm like "word"! give me the details and lets do it! She's like hit me back at 9. cool! I can't wait so get my research on and find out spinna's with him and that they are doing the 1st stevie wonderful party in paris!

Rockstar cuz and I are like yea we're going out tonight. Welela decides not to go! so rock star cuz & i try to reach out to few people because ... i'm spoiled and don't like to pay. Nothings working for me .. nor for him. We decide that we'll use the swagger/mervin technique = we'll just walk up like you're supposed to be guest. So the time comes and we get ready to roll but lil cuz to isn't in bed! She's 13 and hella responsible so it's not a issue so we're out.

We got to the venue as they were switching over from a previous event.
Rockstar cuz talks the talk and we get in. as we're walking in someone screams his name. It's bobbito. And we all walk in together!

As bobbito & spinna are setting up we're watching them break down the venue from the previous event which evidently was a seated event. as they slide the theater style seating under hidden compartments and transform hallways to coat checks i'm amazed! with the tucked away technology and hydro lifts for sections of the floor, it is UNQUESTIONABLY the dopest mid size venue i've ever been to. [la bucalana] The production dude in me is going crazy looking at it all! Then a young lady walks up to us w/ 2 glasses of champagne and welcomes us to the event. We look at each other ... ok ... uhhh ... yea ... “we're glad to be here, thank you!” More talk with them and then some industry talk between us and then ... we sit down and listen to spinna & bobbito warm up. a few minutes later the doors open to the public. And it's on ...

20 minutes later ... we find a little corner on the dance floor and i'm gone... lost in the music!

4 hrs later ... after a few pounds of sweat loss, rock star cuz says ... I wanna check on [lil cuz] ... so ... we roll out. He stops for a second break outside the venue just to cool off. I'm standing there waiting and this fly sister walks up and says something to me in french. I'm so tired that I just nod. She sees it in my eyes and pats me on my check, looks me in my eye and says "awwww." I think that was the first person in paris to flirt w/ me. i'm honored but too tired to really think about it until now ... Anyway ... the cats that threw this are called free your funk ... dope in concept and implementation. the kind of cats JUST BCUS wants to link with .. we'll see what happens.

so we go to the street to get a cab ... but guess what ... brothers can't get a cab! Even in paris! We end up walking home! We make it back and the story is over!

and for those of you that were wondering if i was really in paris ... because i didn't post any pics ... i did this ...

oh ... and i met this cat ... he's hella cool ... he's big in europe right now.
i'm a fan ... he's really about his music. really about being an artist, connect through artistic truths, making personal connections w/ people and the universe and artistic integrity ... the industry sell him as a pop star. but he's a he's a dope artist artist dude.

charlie winston

i'm going to a poetry joint this week ... i'll keep you posted!

Until next time ...

SHiNE [brillez]


Saturday, November 21, 2009

my phone is gone ... and i got work to do ...

ok ...

so i had my phone picked from my jacket pocket last night! in retrospect, i think the sister that was sitting across from me was trying to signal me that it was going down! but hey ... it is what it is and the beat goes on.

what's cool is that i was on my way to meet my new homie welela. hella cool peoples! she's a contact from my other homie kiki joi! i was a little late and when i walked into this spot, chez janou, it was empty. welela greeted me with a smile and a and hug like we'd been long lost friends! she introduced me to benji who was behind the bar. i hadn't even taken my jacket off and benji notices my shirt. he say's "cameroon?". i'm like nah ... then i realize i have my cameroon jersey on. we connect! and although i was blown from the pick pocket experience but a few deep breaths, some good convo and a glass of wine and i moved forward!

i guess the other thing that i wanna share is that i think i made some decisions recently about my life.
occasionally i describe mysel f intheis manner ...


i have decided that i am willing to give up some of my freedom to gain more fiscal wealth which i hope will in turn provide me with some new freeing experiences.

that's kinda big for me. i try to be minimal in my support for some of those things that the masses seem to support blindly. i guess you can say that i've always been a bit of a anti-conformist. it seemed to go well with my want to blend in and be apart of a community. in this moment i realize that my parent's small extended family and my positive influences from their community have created a high respect for community and a NEED for it in my life. NOW ... if i am who i say i am ... i'd challenge that need for community and try to do stuff solo for real!

*damn!!! i hate it when i think myself into situations that make more work for me!*
ok ... i gotta go wrap my head around this ... and go get a new phone!


Thursday, November 19, 2009

creativity, ritual, aesthetics, and focus ...a then a drink!!!

wow ok ...

so check it out ...

i've been everywhere ... mentally ... up down and sideways ...

creativity is out of control ... really ... out of control ... i've started a fleshing out concepts for a play (then the elbow told the pig ...) and a film (To Be named later). then on top of that, i've been doing work on getting focused about life!

so far, my favorite part of my life planning process has been writing out my morning ritual. i have disdain for ritual without reason and these "holy days" that have been commercialized to the point where they are really about helping (or hurting a economy). so for me to be invested in days of or other ritual, or regular re-occurring events they gotta have a real connection to me. like i;m not gonna take a day off just because someone said i'm supposed to. that comes from my pops having us take MLK's b-day off before it was national holiday. now i think that i make the rules! welll i guess i do. in my world. so yea ... giving yourself ritual in your life ... it's important ... for bunch of reasons. the reason i think it's most important is that makes you go through a process where you give yourself answers to why you chose to do (or not to do) something. the one thing i have in my ritual that i;m challenged by is this exercise thing! but the process has reminded me that i'm a morning person ... that likes the idea of a siesta or a nap during the day (ideally a hour or 2, sometime between 3 and 6) ... then i stay up late! "i never sleep ... cause sleep is the cousin of death." (nas) ... by the way if you're in dc ... go see nas & damien marley talk about their new project "distant relatives" at national geographic live!'s space. so yea ... have reason for your actions. but don't be lazy w/ you answer to that questions! ask yourself "why?" 3 times. and that's all about that.

So ... one of my big observations week this about the french appreciation for nice looking things. they have a eye for aesthetics. i do not. i mean when you live a place where the architecture is so poetic and incredible, with it's golden statues atop these grand building, it's history even if it is borrowed/stolen and stuff like this this you become de sensitized to ordinary artwork. it takes something super extra, extra special to move you. like when you've seen or heard a bunch of concerts/artist/photos/paintings you get a more critical sense of what you like and don't like. but that's not the point i really wanted to make (but i gave me a excuse o show some stock pictures of some of the things i've seen so far!!!)

i really wanted to talk about how the U.S. doesn't seem to get it ... all great & powerful societies had a legacy of artistic excellence. to be "powerful" doesn't mean you are a great society. the arts are one of the basis that create a society that is prosperous in all aspects. the arts provide a thought process that expands beyond the rote memorization of facts, figures, formulas and history. a government commitment to showing art in public spaces, making it a part of your education system and a part of everyday life shows its commitment to the progress of its people and shows respect for their intelligence.

and actually ... i do have a taste for personal/fashion wise aesthetics ... but i have a fear of being vain, so i down play my personal style and my want for nice things keeps. (yea ... like nice expensive things too!) i gotta steer away form it in part because it conflicts with my with for quest to just have minimal worldly possessions, and it keeps me in a humble mindset. (nobody say anything about my trainers/sneakers!) but anyway ... here it seems that culturally they appreciate the arts and artist more. so much so, that at this point their taste are so refined in certain area that they just don't care what anyone else says! for real ... everyone here is fashionable ... except me! hahaha ... like i said i'm kinda anti-fashion and my wardrobe choices are limited! but when i finish the music i think i'm gonna shop it for a indie deal and then watch the money roll in and buy a entire new wardrobe! oh .. yea ... i song. but no ... you may never hear will only be a international release, and it will be under a alias! hahaha!

and finally as i think abou tlife i've had to tackle the reality that i'm 39 and have NO stability in my life. i have more freedom than most though. i'm ready to cash in som eof that freedom for stability now and do some thing differently. now i gotta figure out what i'm gonna do differently and how!?!

damn!!! the work is just starting!!!

as you can see this new moon has me open and my mind is a million and one places at the same time.

i need a drink ... i'm headed to a party ...


Sunday, November 15, 2009

fights ... dc ... pacman ... washington ... getting hustled ... lil cuz

it's sunday but this is about ...

Saturday ...

after a few hrs of wondering running into a few more comic book stores & gun shops ... who would have thought) and these french cats are violent ... i personally witnessed 2 fights being broken up. one dude got knocked on his ass by the little waitress ... one to the jaw. i wonder what he did! and the other was a lady that was screaming at a dude. she said some thing and he went at her. his dude jumped in and damn near tackled him when his hand was a fist lengths from hitting her! i was w/ lil cuz so we kept it moving and talked about it for a second. she's such a wanna be G! but i bet no one EVER puts a finger on her. plus ... she has a crazy big-little olser cousin! oh anyway ...

So how I got hustled ... there was a big game on and I was looking for a spot to watch the second half. you know, just sit and have some tea. Just to be social. like i do at cafe nema some days. I find the small african spot around the corner that seems to be having some lively conversation. I go in and the waiterss tells me the bar is closed. I look up and GGGGGOOOOOOOAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL! I stand and watch for a second ... now i'm caught up in the game ... I sit down and watch. The convo that they are having is loud but I have no idea what it's about in part because i'm focused on the game. Evidently some of the convo was about me! Eventually a older dude says to me. You need to order something or leave. I say i'll order. I order a beer. The older dude tells me to order some kinda food &the waitrss tries to get me to order food too. I tell her no meat. Only fish and then I say i've already eaten just a beer. a guiness for now. She's still trying to get me to order food. I order a guiness and continue to watch the game. She brings my drink. I watch the game, chat w/ dude, enjoy the game. It seems that their convo is around national loyalty versus where you live. It had something to do with the cameroon game earlier that day and the lone white dude in the spot! Then she brings out a plate of skewers ... I didn't order that! She's like yes you did. It's what he said you should order. There's a stillness in the room as I start to argue my point. I'm not gonna win in this. I share the order w/ the older dude at the table next to me. the game goes on. France wins 1-0. I ask for the check. It's $30 e! 12E for the beer and $18 e for the meal is how it was explained to me by the older dude. I start to argue then realize it's a no win situation. in the end I think I got beat out of $20e = $35 ... to watch a soccer game. As the older dude leaves. (he and his friend have a finished a bottle of black label) he thanks me for the food, tells me that he works for the cameroon embassy and to e-mail him. I ask if he's in the restaurant much. He drunkenly says that the waitress is his sister and another lady there is his big sister. There is some loud convo ... and he's reminded that he needs to go. He hands me his card and rolls out. I leave soon after that. And realive how I got hustled by the brother & sister team, damnit! and ... i'm made at myself for not being able to speak french and for not being mad at them because I love the ingenuity of my peoples!

I also realize the date nov 14 ... OHHHHH ... manny pacman pacquio vs cotto! It's late so I lay it down but set my alarm so that I can wake up and follow in on or something. So I wake up and has the blow by blow commentary! I'm enjoying the fight as I imagine pacquio do his thing! Walking through cotto's assults and returning with twice the fury! He's gonna be regarded as one of the pound for pound greatest of all times. This dude is a monster!!! I would have loved to be at a nice fight party. did you see what he did to cotto. my home girl said he looked like golum. It seems there was a lot going on in dc last night! Goodie mob w/ scarface, and a few parties, cedric the entertainer, and fight parties.

now that i'm away ... there are a few things about DC that i really appreciate.

5. U Street: it's nice to have a place that's familiar to you and you are invested in it's success and there are people, businesses and organizations that want you to be successful too. plus there is a creative energy that lives there. one that i don't think is being tapped past its juvenile stages. surface levels. and don't get me wrong ... there are those that i think are getting deep in the energy of u street but many are just being creative and not really getting intimate w/ their art forms. but i love that U street is a place where people come to be creative and support creative things!

4. the abundance of pretty women: yea ... i'm kinda used to having pretty women around me. it helps my eye for aesthetics. and it keeps me from acting a fool when a fly sister is around because in my circle that's the norm. more importantly the sisters that i interact with, help to keep me balanced and provide a certain intimacy that allows me to not be a sexual predator. [just send me a e-mail if you want to hear my philosophy on sexual and intimate energy] and it feeds my creative energy too. and they're around here ... i have yet to get in that circle ... yet.

3. chocolate city fashions: i miss the mix of washington and the DC fashions, the pinstrip suits and the sobiato gear the earthy head wraps and the thursday @ the park happy hour & then josephine's & love outfits too!

2. my crew: we're all doing a bunch of stuff here and there so we don't link much but knowing that i have access to hem is important to me. i've been in dc, ny, nc & paris over the past 15 yrs ... they've been with everywhere. i love my peoples

1. community: I think I figured out why I haven't flipped over the fact that i'm in paris!?! it's my need to be attached to a community here. I'm at fault for not learning the language but I came to do me and learn here. If you gave me a contact here and they are still looking for a call from me ... i'm here for a few more weeks ... trust me ... i'll call!

today ... i chilled ... slept ... wrote this ... started fleshing out a new creative idea, sweated bullets while i let my lil cuz cook ... she's got a lemon cake in the oven now!!!

and that's all folks ...


Saturday, November 14, 2009

news flash: change of plans ... home alone ...

it rained on and off to day and usually rain + cold = stay inside but ...

i'm in paris so ... when the sun came out ... i dipped out to the streets ... just in the neighorhood. no exploring ...

so i went by to get my phone but ... the shop owners are muslim and it was time for prayer ... cool ... i be back later ... prayer again ... then rain ...

at this point i saw a cute little dark thing lookin' at me from a shop that walked by almost everyday near the apartment SO ... i walked in introduced myself ... asked how much ... then she said she was a virgin ... and showed me she was ... then i did what i needed to do to leave with her! now ... she's here with me and we're home alone.

i have a few people to call but i can save these minute by calling form the land line!

i mean for real ... i don't wanna wear her out on the first day ... plus she doesn't know how i get when get into the zone ... and i may be on her for a while! i gotta pace her.

and everyone else rolled out for the night ... so ... i'm at the apartment alone tonight ... i've got no choice but to ... hit the streets tonight!

or ... finally reach out to those people friends suggested that i link with ...
if not i just sit here and write more ...

and this is already too long ... so ...

later ...


Friday, November 13, 2009

2nd friday night in paris ... my confession (read it all & don't be mad at me) ... shut up, please ...

Last week was transition week.

This week ... I am officially in my “do work on self week”
and it's a beautiful day for this! The sun is shining. It's kinda warm.
I'm in my money shirt & fresh suede puma's ... feeling a little like ... the world's shortest giant!

Now ... in the effort to be openly honest there is something I need to say ...
I haven't told everyone that my girlfriend is here ... I part because we're not really interacting. those of you that know me closely know that she's always with me ... most days she's the one I wake up to ... and she guides my day ... but, like I said, we've been disconnected since we've left the states. we're just not communicating.
but it's a lovely day today ... and in paris ... and feeling good ... and i'm doing things that make me feel good ... So ... i'm looking for a new girl ... yep, I said it ... and yes, she knows it. She's with me while I do it! So she nor you can be mad at me or call me disrespectful. if we're not synced it's not gonna happen for but so long! synced w/ someone! i need a new girlfriend!

NOW ... You really wanna know why i'm telling you this?
because this is how my day was ... So ... here's how the story goes ...

there a lot of shady little spots in my neighbor hood w/ cuties in the window. And i'm a man w/ testosterone, that chemical that creates logic inhibitors that make us likes things that have a new sparkle & shine! anyway ... I've passed a few of these spots in my explorations of the city and have even looked into a few windows. i made what seemed to me to be a "special" contact with one in particular. today made abold move. I went in and asked about prices ... while my girlfriend was there with me. She didn't say a word. She knows why i'm here and isn't gonna deny me my freedom to do what makes me happy because that's a big part of this trip for me. and to make a story that is already too long and probably has you cringing and cursing me out ... today, I met a new “temporary girlfriend.” Honesty, she's not as fly as my current girlfriend. She's not as aesthetically pleasing or smart. my old jawnt was dark black but this one has these orange undertones. she's built sturdy and has the tools to get what I need done though! she's goona communicate w/ me too. that'ssomething my girlfriend and i haven't really done in a week! SO YEA ... today ... I found a new cell phone! What? You thought I was talking about a young lady! Come on! If you know me I always refer to my cell phone as my girlfriend. HAHAHA!!!

but for real ... so this is my 2nd friday in paris. Lil cuz and I decide that we're gonna go out and grab some food. Sushi is her choice. We go around the corner to the spot that she usually goes to. I' m like nah ... on top of it being expensive it had a real corny vibe to me. So ... I was like ...lets walk ... lets explore! She was with it and we walked ... and walked ... past numerous mcdonald's ... past the “aged” asian hookers ... pst subway sandwich shop ... and we find ourselves on a street corner ... i look down it to see if there are any signs of restaurants ... I stop and look ... there are people walking on the street ... some are just chilling talking ... other strolling up & down ... but somethings not right ... then it hits me ... there are ladies every few feet and they are the ones chillin' ... the dudes are walking up and down the street trying get a trick ... so I just say ... there's nothing on this block, lets go ... at his point she notices the young girls on the corners and is like ... “ohhh yea! ummm, lets go ... weshouldn't be here!” ... so we walk ... and we walk ... past the comedy club ... past kfc ... pat the movie theater showing "THIS IS IT" ... then we find a cool little sushi spot ... we sit down and she decides that she wants to work on her french by ordering ... in my mind i'm like “ok. And I'll work on mine at the end of the meal.” ... great ... GREAT MEAL (and cheap!!!) ... she's happy ... i'm happy ... good biz ... so it's time for me to ask for the check but she wants to do it .. she gives me something to say in french that is the casual way to say check please ... i ee thewaitress behind meso i turn around ... “madame ... t'si vous si vous plait” ... I said it perfect ... no hesitation and accented w/ flavor ... the waitress looks at me stunned ... I repeat myself ... she looks through me & across the table at my lil cuz ... she's got her face on the table laughing ... she says ... “fini ... fini” (or something like that) ... she looks up at me and with a laughing smile and tells me that I told the waitress “shut your mouth, please” please... DAMN!!! she got me!!! ... I pay the check and walk out ... I try to thank her but the waitress brushes me off ... so yea ... then we walked home ... uneventfully except that i beat my lil cuz in foot race! Hahaha! yea ... 3X her age and i still have that step (but damn ... she is fast!)

and that's how I spent my 2nd friday in paris ... trust me it's gonna get more exciting.

I've come up w/ a few script ideas. you wanna know about em? maybe ... Can someone tell me the legal ramifications & copyright laws about if I can use posting the ideas in public as a ways of documenting that they are my ideas?

Oh and she asked what we were gonna do tomorrow? I guess you'll have to wait to find out ... me too!!!

ShiNE [brillez]

Thursday, November 12, 2009

stuff you may want to know ...

sorry ... i didn't do anything the other day ...

i walked again ... but for real ... i'm not gonna bore you with how yesterday was aholiday and peope were out as families just kicking it. or descriptions of the cobblestone streets along the river or the skateboarders everywhere. or the 2 cats that were in a 5 vs 5 pick up, streetball hoop game that pretty much ignored the rest of the team and won anyway! dudes jumper were SICK ... and won on a shot that was had a dude guarding him like he was funk on dog shit! yea ... it was serious! i wish i could have understood the shit talking that was going on!

why bore you with stories of the skate ramp and how the father was ther killin' it on the ramp and who i'm assuming was his 5 or 6 year old had her scooter and was going up and down the ramp too! watchout x-games! or the kid that busted trying to do the rail slides others were doing. but then did it & everyone cheered!

i just won't bore you w/ another story of me getting lost (in the cold) but finding these dope little neighborhoods with fly ass boutique shops for eveerything. clothes jewelery, bags, scarves, comic books, (one had a witchcraft card game tournament happening! youth and elders getting it in!)

or how my lil cuz and i had dinner and listened to music last night. we rocked the dead weather, emiliana torrini , e-badu & stephen marley and a few DC artist ... she dug some of them (i won her ever on more than she didn't like!)

so i know people are looking for pictures and i have some but they are on my phone ... and i'm having blackberry tech issues linking my phone to my computer ... so please be patient w/ me. and for on a really real note. this blog is as much about me and my process as it is a way for me to share with you but it's really important that right now ... i put me first and me, i don't like taking pictures of stuff! i leave that to photographers ... cause that's what they do. but ... i do respect the documentation of history. it has to be more than me saying i did this and that.

and if you don't know, i'm here to take in the experience of paris not as tourist but as a person experiencing life differently. for me that means slowing down. not being involved in the night life. it means sitting silently ... in silence. doing things that i wouldn't do in DC. like ... do nothing. take time to intentionally write something ... like this blog. this is a time for me to clarify my goals in life as a individual and as a part of a greater circle of community/friends/family.

i'm evaluating my vision/focus & direction i'm moving as well as my strengths and weakness ... and i'm open to listen to what others say ... so hit me w/ the feed back! and be honest with me. i'm a grown man. i'll be ok. it's important that i get feed back from my community about what they see and don't see in me. what people say and think is important to me because i see myself as a part of something larger than myself. i see that my role can be in conflict to what others might see me doing but hey ...

now ... saying all that ... i'm letting you know that i'm gonna go into my mind a little more and be talking about what's really going on with me. my artistic evolution as well as my personal growth and epiphanies.

so yea ... i'll get some pics up but they may not be of anything you can already see on a postcard or online already.

you know i gotta add a little flavor ... JUST BCUS (yea ... that's a teaser!)

oh and i'm trying to get a sense of if people are even reading this so if you could just shoot me a comment on this page or a message to my facebook. thank you.

for the next post i hope to have stories of visual art, new friends, technology & pirates!


Tuesday, November 10, 2009

me and t.o.!

today was a little different ...

i spent time being alone and silent ... semi-meditation like ...
it's something i hadn't done in a long time.

it was a challenge for me to still my mind ... in fact i was just silent.
my mind was in a milion and one places .. but hey ... it;s the first time in a long time. i'll get my focus up and really be still in time. it reminded me that it not really ready to get out and engage in the business of my trip. i want take care of me before i start doing business for everyone else, ya dig!?! so on that note ... flashback 6-8 weeks ago ...

i go to see my lil homie ally wey perform at a spot called bossa in dc and i run into my dude "z free". he's kicking it real casual like ... as he usually does. after the show, i'm on my way out the door he ask me what i've got coming up next. i tell him i'm about to dip to paris. there are a few people at the table he's sitting at and one of them, maria, gets kinda excited and tells me about this person she knows in paris. and that when i walked in she noticed that he and i had similar energy and that we should connect. i'm like ... i only know 1 person in paris so cool. i give her a card and ask her to make a e-mail introduction. a few days later i get at e-mail introducing me to this dude and i respond very casually about looking forward to meet him in paris. a few more days go by and i get a email ... something along the lines of ...

is this weusi weusi from u street?
this is tunde tunde from dc ... & ny!
this will be our 3rd city. lets make it happen!

so today ... i went to meet my dude tunde (t.o.). we're like mined brothers from different mothers. we first met in DC on the u street poetry & music scene. then he disappeared. a few years later i ran into him on the streets of ny where he was in law school.

today we started the process of catching up and moving forward. we sat and kicked it in a cafe for a while. some real talk. he's been in and out of paris for years and is here studying law. he also has been a part of the arts and music scene too. he shared some great insight about the subtle nuances of developing community in this culture. we talked about life in paris. and life in general. i'm no dummy. partialy becasue i don't talk about things i don't know. t.o. is no dummy because he can talk about so much with a sense of expertise and research! he's a bright brother. i'm glad to be reacquainted. my man brian "hustle" hamlin says that you are only as good as the 5 people that are closet to you. i take those words to heart and try to surround myself with people brighter than me! that's why all of you are my friends! the other interesting thing about meeting with t.o. was the music in the cafe ... boys to men, chante moore, the supremes, the police, steel pulse and of course ... stevie wonder! anyway ... i'm sure you'll hear more stories about t.o. in the future.

and yes ... i did walk to meet him .. and yes .. i did get lost ... but only because it was this little ass st

i'm starting to get settled here ... maybe another week of nothing and then i'll go into grind mode! i've got some great ideas bubblin' right now! i'll let you know what's up ...

stay focused, create a plan, work that plan, change that plan, stay focused and make it happen ...

and for those of you who wonder what i mean when i say SHiNE [brillez] my homies elen & bassey (twitter @ladiosapoderosa & @basseyworld ) hipped me to this: the god light

do what you do ...

SHiNE [brillez]

Monday, November 9, 2009

so today was a little different. i got HELLA LOST!!!
my sense of direction didn't do so well for me ... but ...

i saw a few of the sites that people have been asking be about ...

the tower
the pyramid
the river
the arch
the hookers
the tourist
the museums
the traffic
the lights at night
the shopping area's
the churches

it was all jive cool ...
but more interesting was the h&m, zara, gap and my favorite us export to france so far ... the subway sandwich shop! no but for real ...

the architecture of this city is crazy
i don't know the names of nearly anything that i've seen but i know this place is incredible.

i found a record shop today it was all hip hop. it was cool but i wasn't really looking for wax and i'm out of the loop so i wouldn't know what to get anyway!

i also found a OLD comic book shop ... this dude had the marvel comic 1-13 by stan lee but it was in french! they aren't in great condition but it's a complete set!!! and they are in good enough condition to read!

my lil cuzzo hit a mental wall while trying to do a paper. i tried to help her through it but she just needed to call her pops. eventually they talked and we got her on track. it was funny though. i felt like i was working w/ my kids again!

i know this is a kind of boring post but i go to meet my dude tunde for a game of chess tomorrow! i'll fill you in on the significance of this occurring tomorrow/later!

i've been reading and refreshing the artist in me ... but i had a long convo w/ my dudes girlfriend about visioning, organizational planning and structure. i even pulled out some SOL y SOUL info for her! yea ... i have this organizing thing bad. i just wanna feel what it's like to be purely artist for a couple of days. to be engulfed in the creative process. i want that experience to be out of my logical head. but i'm struggling to get there. and i know it's gonna take time but DAMN!!!
i'm in paris ... i wanna be creative! i guess i gotta stop worrying about how to speak french for a second and just do me ... i also want to sing in the shower ... but there's no shower!!! DAMNNNNNN!

actually, my sense of direction got me pointed in the right direction and but i just couldn't get to the spot that i wanted to!

but in the end ... i'll get there!


Saturday, November 7, 2009


friday night in paris ...

yesterday, during theday, i walked around. just to see what i could see. to experience paris as a regular joe. it wasn't a sight seeing adventure. it was me just walking down the street. it was a great experience. the layout of the city is crazy! hella intricate and awkward for me right now. i haven't figured out the logic of it yet. i got lost a few times but found my way thanks to a few landmarks and metro signs! i didn't even ask people how to get back i just did it. i'm glad that i have a decent sense of direction and noticed a few landmarks! i walked down ST DENIS & across the lil bridge & along the little river for a second. it was kinda uneventful. but there was a club the looked kinda interesting.

it was cool to be able to walk around and not talk to anyone. with a creative, attention seeking, 13 year old in the house, there is limited silent time!

it was interesting to me that i fit in too. i feel so out of place here. i don't know what to wear. and i feel like my walk is different and i walk slow and don't have a scarf on [everyone here has these fly scarves]. but i guess this is a great step to start feeling comfortable. i know i can hang now.

i don't need to tell you that the architecture of the city is incredible. the church steeples, arches, cottages & flats are cool! i find myself looking at the intricate doorways and iron work around the city. and people watching. there's a certain freedom in the diversity in the people that is impressive too. now there are still cliques but from the outside looking in things look pretty cool. i imagine that the issues aren't based on race as much as they are on economic standings and "class".

and with all this ... the most impressive things i saw yesterday were ...

A KFC that was full of both black & white people!!!
A pizza hut & another mcdonald's

AND ... i saw a dude rocking a redskins jacket! i wanted to take a picture but ... opted not to ... and he was a french dude ... not a tourist! i know because he was speaking french to the dudes on ST DENIS that were trying to get people to go to certain barber shops for a haircut! ST DENIS is the black hair spot in paris! it's pretty funny the way they tried to recruit ME to go get a cut ... they obviously don't know me!

last night was my first friday night in paris ... but ...
i didn't know it until 8pm, our time! here's what happened ...

i left DC on wed after not having much sleep for almost 48 hrs ... and then i slept on the flight. i got to paris and it really didn't click that it was another day. so in my mind thursday was wed and yesterday was thursday. it didn't click until we were sitting at dinner and lil cuzzo says "so it's friday night what are we going o do!" i looked perplexed. she knew exactly what was going on in my mind.
"DUHHHHH ... yes ... it's friday!"

we ended up sitting around listening to music and sharing youtube favorites. this is my new favorite! evidently her name is Charice Pempengco. but wait until after you rad this to watch it ... you'll end up watching it a few times!!!

i'm sure that you would rather see pics of paris than this but you will be impressed and i'm working on the pics ... patience!

this morning we sang "o' say can you see" about 10 times ... and it was like a vegas showtune version f/ her as whitney houston/ceiline dion and me as lou rawls/wayne newton! yes ... it was ... interesting!

and after that ran it's course they introduced me to their saturday dance ritual. it's when they put on music and dance. it was cool! i did a little up rock and was inspired to the point that i almost hit a headspin on a michael jackson tune but opted to save that move for another day! ok, truthfully ... i was in the headstand and felt like i could do it ... i just didn't have the space if i fell... and yes ... i didn't want to kill myself!

anyway ... the shift in time it hasn't clicked yet ...
so last night after we spent our quality time together i went out in the rain and just walked around. this time up ST DENIS. i got lost but found my way back and didnt
take munch in ... i was cool. i needed that time alone to start to figure things out.
i spoke to a friend here and we'll link on mon or tuesday.

day 2 ... this is a good trip...

SHiNE [brillez]

Friday, November 6, 2009

day 1 in paris ... the begining ...

this kinda long ... but it's the start of something new ...

i was awake for almost 48 hrs before i got on the plane so ... i fell asleep before we took off ...
i was w/ my lil cousin and she was seated somewhere else on the plane ... but she's 13 going on 33 and i didn't really worry about her.

i awoke to dinner being served ... pasta & wild mushrooms, cous cous, water, bread pudding, chocolate cake ... and of course on a air france flight ... a baguette, some cheese & wine.
i ate and then went back to sleep ... thanks to "soul fatigue" (my new term for the "itis").

i awoke again for breakfast ... it was a sweet roll, yogurt, water and tea and some other stuff but i don't really remember ... i ate the roll and went back to sleep. yea ... again ... "soul fatigue"

then the plane hit a little dip as we started to descend. i'm awake now ...

i read a few articles in my INC mag on stan lee, ayn rand and 19 blogs that they felt i should bookmark ... good stuff ... but anyway ...

we land ... go through customs ... we get our baggage and after a few minutes find our bearings, then ... we exchange our dollars for euro's ... DAMN ... my feelings were hurt ... my hard earned money was worth NOTHING! [note to self: find a way to make some euro's!!!] we made our way to the train. my baggage got caught in the turnstile and i got to say "merci!" ... i was excited to get to use 1 of the 4 french words i know!!!

we ride the train to gard de nord and walk a few blocks to the house. the neighborhood is kinda tourist heavy ... there's a lot going around here. i'm sure you'll here more in the days/weeks to come.

we get to the house and meet the house mate and she shows me around. the rooftop view is CRAZY!!! i'm having issues w/ my phone and up loading the pics but i'll show you sooner or later.

a cold autumn rain ... good conversation ... napping ... sleeping on and off .. few cups of tea & homemade chocolate cake ... a walk to the grocery store ... a stop at a cafe for coffee ... more convo w/ corrections on my poor french pronunciations ... food ... sleep ...

today ...
i awake to sunshine ... drink tap water ... read (the everyday work of art by eric booth) ... unpack my sneakers & grandpa's jacket ... listen to silence ... journal ... some tunes (these are some of my the artist in the mix ... FE, crossrhodes, issabella banneker, stephen marley, neena freelon, purple st james, k'alyn, mary lou williams, munch, adelle, kev brown, etc) ... now, i'm writing this blog but i'm about to hit the streets for a few hrs ... and do nothing ... no sight seeing today ... i'm really doing nothing!!!

this feels good ... a real cool vibe ...*(thank you all)* ... stay tuned!

so ... later ...

paris day 1 [haiku x3]

here time means nothing.
sun, sound, art and my truth lead.
visions trek blindly.

dark rooftop skylights
play slow motion pity pat
with the sun & clouds

no rush ... day meets night.
the time is now ... then it's gone.
enjoy the moment.

SHiNE [brillez]